Dream: I am standing at the kitchen sink. There is a thick wine goblet sitting on the windowsill, full of red wine. I think to myself, “Hmmm, maybe Melissa (my 17year old) has been drinking.” I pour the wine down the drain and begin washing the goblet with sudsy water and a sponge. As I am washing it occurs to me that perhaps Melissa is doing an experiment for science and that she is going to be checking the pH of the wine after it sits out over night. I consider filling the glass again. Just then, Mark walks in through the sliding glass door in the kitchen from the outside. I turn towards him saying, “I didn’t know you were out there.” I begin to approach him, feeling love and warmth for him.

Rodger starts by asking me how I feel when I see the wine goblet sitting there. I don’t have a feeling. He then asks me why my first thought was “maybe Melissa has been drinking”. Why would I not think… “Oh, how nice. A glass of wine. I think I will take a sip. Maybe Mark put it here for me.” The wine is there, inviting me to take a sip. Taking a sip represents dipping into life and realizing it is all mine. The sky, the leaves [references from another dream] the wine… whatever. It’s all waiting for me to take it. I need to feel that I deserve it. Perhaps the animus planted it there as another provocation. Instead of being there I “jump away” by going into my head thinking that Melissa has been drinking. The glass is full so it is obvious that she hasn’t been drinking it. I am afraid to be in the moment. I don’t think of it as my wine. I don’t even consider it.

In the next part of the dream I consider filling the wine glass up again after I have poured it out. This is a sneaky plan that I come up with. My pathology has gotten even more carried away. First I don’t drink the wine and come up with the Melissa drinking idea. Then I think of this stupid science experiment idea and make a plan to pour more wine in the glass to cover up that I poured it out.

My homework is to imagine taking a sip of the wine.

I like this homework. My imagination takes it a bit further as I see the red wine completely filling my entire body up as I sip it. It feels great. I love what Rodger said….. taking a sip represents dipping into life and realizing it is all mine. That thought keeps coming back to me. Somehow it rings true.

Since the dream took place in my actual kitchen (usually my dreams are located in another place that I don’t recognize), I am reminded of it anytime I do the dishes. I see the windowsill there and I imagine taking a sip of that wine.