Dream: Given a theme, I am supposed to create a scene out of it. It will eventually be made into a sort of interactive theme park for people to attend. The theme has something to do with a huge eyeball [my girls used to laugh at the word ‘eyeball’ when they were little]. I create my part of the design and then the theme park people add to it making it into the park. Everyone is having so much fun there. This place is all about fun. There are people skiing over a grassy hill without any snow. I laugh so hard over and over as I see skier after skier coming over the hill. I love the feeling of laughing as it bubbles up from deep down inside me.
Rodger asks me “why are you creating a scene from an eyeball”? I tell him its for fun. He asks why again and I say, “It’s fun for no reason”. “That’s joy”, he says. Yes, he’s right. Fun for no reason is joy. In this dream I am being creative, silly and fun – joyful. This is a part of myself that has not been fully present for a long time. I used to be more silly – enjoy life for the sake of life…but it has faded away as I have grown into a responsible adult. My silly fun side wants to be expressed again. It is part of who I am. Silliness is also “fun for no reason”. At some point in my life, my pathology came in and said that silly is bad. I see the pathology as being that part of myself that is keeping me from myself. The dream is showing me that I don’t want to be a “grown up” anymore. I want to connect with that joy of my youth that “bubbles up from deep down inside of me”.
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